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9:20: As we pass the quiet and dark Riverboat Casino on the Missouri River outside of Kansas City, It dawns on me why casinos are so damn successful. Bright lights and free alcohol. First they draw the suckers into the building by flashing all kinds of lights and others things to get people. People love flashing lights and shiny things.
And then once they are inside and safely gambling away money, the casinos liqueur em up to keep them inside and gambling. I mean honestly, who would pass up free alcohol to stop gambling? I mean for real? What sane, normal person would pass that opportunity up. I thought so.
9:21: Passing the Kansas City stadiums again. Kauffman Stadium looks so sad. No wonder the Royals suck so much.
9:28Passing through Independence, MO. Do you think they have a bigger July 4 celebration there? I’m not sure, I mean they might.
9:43: As we passed yet another porn shop and fireworks factory – not at the same facility, but that would be interesting – so anyway, as were passing this one dude, driving a maroon Jeep Liberty. Didn’t know they came in maroon, but not really a fan. Anyway…He had a bumper sticker that said “freedom isn’t free,” so I expected a huge beard. No beard but he was smoking a pipe. A pipe!!!
How bad-ass is that? I mean for real, pipes make you feel like Sherlock Holmes, cigars make you feel like Winston Churchill, and cigarettes like a 16-year old rebellious teenager.
9:51: Corn. Haven’t seen any of that since we got on the 435 around 27 miles outside of Kansas City.
(Side note: I love Dane Cook. We are listening to it in the car and he cracks me up. Some highlights: The BK Lounge, The Car Alarm, the Shark Joke.
11:01: We stop at a Steak & Shake in Columbia for lunch, definitely a different one from the first one, but it serves food. So we’re all good. Took a brief respite from blogging to take a nap. Awoke to hear Dane talking about the Nothing Fight. Classic.
11:07: On the placemat we are told that “Coca-Cola is served ever-so-proudly here.”
11:13: The bathroom could be laid out better, and we’ll leave it at that. But its clean, so I won’t complain.
11:46: The World’s Largest Indoor Playground is at Burger King at Exit 131 in Columbia. Or so they claim…
11:54: Saw a sign for “The Horny Toad” Hmmmm. About to go through Kingdom City. I wonder if there is a city called Corn City.
11:59: Ok, the Missouri football program officially takes the cake for advertising. They have gone to a new level that I never even existed. They took out SIX billboards. M-I-Z-Z-O-U. Each one said something different. Some gave the team’s website, other’s the team phone number and some had motivational slogans. However, I guess they have nothing better to do in the middle of Missouri.
1:21: Very little of actual importance happened since the last hour. The I-70 was full of corn and porn shops. WE were detoured din St. Louis because of construction, but it was easy and didn’t cause us any real heartbreak.
We can see the Arch again, which is still really cool, but didn’t bring nearly the response of last time. And now for the super exciting drive through Ill-nothing.
1:27: We passed the awesome part of St. Louis –well actually it’s all really cool – but we passed the Scottrade Center (home of the Blues) and Busch Stadium (home of the Cardinals). Both look spectacular and I would love to come back and visit them. On a related note, we passed a huge Purina factory, for those with dogs.
1:28: We crossed the Mississippi and officially entered Illinois. Awesome. I’m trying to keep it professional and contain my excitement, but that’s really difficult.
1:34: Wow, as we stopped for gas in Illinois we experienced quite a shock. West of the mighty Mississippi gas was between $3.79 - $3.89. Here on the eastside, gas is $4.29 and I have definitely felt safer, to be frank.
1:55: Holy Crap. We just passed a car exactly like the General Lee from Dukes of Hazzard, same color, same number, rebel/confederate flag on the top, everything. I would’ve have expected that to come a little later in our trip (Kentucky perhaps?). Apparently there are rednecks in southern Illinois too though.
5:35: Well unfortunately, after several failed attempts at finding wi-fi, we are still unable to post, and will have to wait until we get back to Georgia. I took over driving, while Tyler drove, and it was pretty unexciting. It seems that the return trip went by much quicker, but many return trips seem that way. A Jetta who was also making the return trip from Omaha followed us, but he went to get gas at an earlier exit and we lost him. Aw well.
7:45ish> So, I guess no one ever told Tennessee that fireworks and gas stations don’t mix, as one of the state’s largest fireworks dealers was attached to – of all things – a frigging gas station? For real guys? C’mon, are you asking for some horrible accident that is bound to happen eventually? That is so mind-boggling, I can’t even get over it.
7:59 CST: We just crossed the border from the central time zone to the eastern time zone, and our phones went from 7:59 pm to 9:00, we completely skipped 8:00. I swear to goodness, that we could not have timed it any better. I was going to give us a four-minute grace period but I didn’t even need it. Nothing of any real importance happened since 5:35, believe me, we just really want to be done with trip.
9:03: We spent all of two minutes in Georgia, as the I-24 winds briefly into the Peach State before going back into Tennessee.
9:17: We reentered Georgia for good. Unless I’m flying there, I am not going anywhere for a while.
10:05: In the parking lot of an Adairsville, Georgia McDonalds, we saw as many sheriffs in the parking lot (two) as we had seen police officers today period. The only other officers we saw were in Kentucky, both going in the opposite direction. In fact, those two officers in Kentucky were more than we had seen driving to Omaha. Wow.
10:27: ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Why is there this much traffic in Ackworth at 10:30 p.m.? People should be in bed, it’s a weeknight, there is no special event going on in this location and that this hour? We are going on less than five hours of sleep, nerves are frayed; we have been in this car for way too long. Please make it stop, I just want to be back in Athens.
12:30a.m.: Finally, after picking up a Red & Black Tyler dropped me off at O-House, but I was so happy to be back in Athens that I am not longer tired. My body is physically exhausted, but I can’t fall asleep. Thank goodness I have time to study.
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